Change this one thing to get closer to becoming a happy homemaker

Self-talk can bring you far or hold you back

“Gah….I’m so stupid!”
“Ugh…I’m so fat.”
“I can’t do this. What was I thinking?”
“What’s wrong with me?“
“I’m never going to be able to do this!”

Sound familiar? While I would love to think no one else deals with this I know that isn’t true. Negative self-talk is a toxic trait that needs to be extinguished quickly. But how in the world do I get rid of it?

Answer: I’m no therapist, but I believe the best way to get rid of this negative self-talk is to really reflect on your life and see how it all started? Resolve the deeper issue. It’s like putting out a fire. You extinguish at the base. Once you’ve discovered the issue, you’ll want to retrain your brain to say more positive things about yourself. It’s not about always being positive, it’s about being kinder to yourself. Rewording the usually negative outburst can help you really reconfigure your whole life. It takes work and time, but it’s definitely possible. In this blog post, I’ll give you a few examples of how you can do this. I’ll also share my story in the hopes you can relate to this.

Words do hurt and affect your homemaking journey.

My negative self-talk came from an early age. People say words don’t hurt; they are so wrong. They cut like knives and can rob you of so much joy! Growing up, I’ve always been sensitive to everything; words, looks, emotions, etc. affected me far more than they should’ve. But as a child, I paid close attention to what was really happening. It’s like I could feel the atmosphere change even if no one else could. If someone was feeling down…I felt their emotion and somehow decided it was my burden to bear.

So when I got into trouble (ya know…a kid gotta kid), a common phrase I would hear is “what’s wrong with you?” Well, after hearing that so many times I really started to internalize this question and thought that something was wrong with me. After every mistake I made, I would say to myself (sometimes even out loud) “What’s wrong with me? I’m so stupid.”

Have you thought about when your negative self-talk started? Or is it not a thing for you?

What happens when you repeat the same thing?

Eventually, if you say something enough, you start to believe it…even if what you’re saying is a lie. It pains me that I spent a large chunk of my life talking to myself so harshly…so negatively….so hatefully. It really makes me sick. If you’re dealing with this (and it’s likely you are since you’re reading this), please work on extinguishing this toxic trait. It will NEVER benefit you. 

A few years ago, I’ve started working on changing how I talk to myself, and let me say this….while I’m not all the way “cured”…I’m definitely a lot nicer to myself. I want to share my insight with you.

When I make a mistake now, I make a conscious effort to say, “Well THAT was stupid!” Do you see the difference? Because it might have been a dumb mistake…but I wasn’t the dumb one. I bet this simple change can help you start talking better to yourself as well. If you struggle with this particular outburst, practice rephrasing. 

You and I have wasted so much time believing we couldn’t do something because we told ourselves we couldn’t do it. Imagine how much better we would be as homemakers and how much further we would be in our lives if had we just had better self-talk. Honestly, who wants to do something you don’t think is going to succeed anyway? It’s much easier to do the things you believe in.

So if you haven’t already decided to change your self-talk, please consider being kinder to yourself. So many things get in our way and make it harder for us to accomplish our goals and dreams, but more often than not we are our own biggest hurdle.

How to get rid of negative self-talk?

So how do you get rid of negative self-talk? Simple…(the method…not the process)! You simply change a few words around. Instead of saying, “I’m so stupid”, after making a mistake say, “man, that was stupid” or “well, that didn’t work out”.

I also believe doing meditations and devotions have helped me and are still helping me overcome this detrimental mentality. It could help you too.

Simple changes over time make a world of difference. The method is easy, however, the process takes time and a consistent conscious effort to accomplish. You may also find having affirming quotes plastered everywhere so you can read them helpful.

Conclusion

When you stop allowing yourself to speak negatively towards yourself, you’ll find that you’ll be more willing to try new things, but better efforts into already existing things, and be a whole lot happier. So love yourself enough to speak kindly to yourself.

So what’s wrong with me?

Absolutely nothing!

~Celeste

PS: Nothing is wrong with you either!

I would love to help you reword the usual blurt out when things go left. What is something you usually tell yourself? Put it in the comments and I’ll help you reword it.